DOG HAIKUS

Today I sniffed
Many dog butts--I celebrate
By kissing your face

I sound the alarm!
Paperboy--come to kill us all--
Look! Look! Look! Look! Look!

How do I love thee?
The ways are numberless as
My hairs on the rug.

My human is home!
I am so ecstatic I have
Made a puddle.

I Hate my choke chain.
Look, world, they strangle me!
Ack! Ack! Ack! Ack! Ack! Ack!

Look in my eyes and
Deny it. No human could
Love you as much I do.

The cat is not all
Bad--She fills the litter box
With Tootsie Rolls.

Dig under fence--why?
Because it's there. Because it's
there. Because it's there.

I am your best friend,
Now, always, and especially
When you are eating.

My owners' mood is
Romantic--I lie near their
Feet. I pass gas a lot.